We Grieve and Then We Fight
3 ways to put your rage and fear to work
ROCK PAPER RADIO is a dispatch for misfits & unlikely optimists by Kristin Leong. It’s a weekly email newsletter that shares three curiosities every Thursday - something to hold on to, something to read, and something to listen to. This post is a special edition in response to the passing of Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg last Friday, September 18, 2020. Thank you for subscribing and sharing.
I doomscrolled in shock whispering no no no no no to my Twitter feed until McConnell’s evil but predictable declaration oozed into my timeline. I closed my laptop and wept.
My wife Keri, rage scrolling next to me, reached out and put her hand on mine. My tween son, looking up from a video game, came around the table with a hug and some assurance: It’s okay mom, 2020’s just getting out all the bad stuff and then everything’s going to get better.
Keri and I asked him what he knows about the Supreme Court. His understanding was vague. He is in middle school.
Who is responsible for this gap—the public school system? Me, his mom, who not too long ago was a middle school teacher? The makers of Minecraft? Yes. All of us.
The rage boiled and frothed.
Keri and I took a breath and then dove into a quick history lesson with our boy.
AN IMPROMPTU EDUCATION
We talked about Loving v. Virgina, which guaranteed marriage rights to interracial couples like my parents, and Keri’s parents and paternal grandparents. We talked about how our lineage is literally a path cleared by just laws and rebellious pairings. I saw my child’s green eyes flash.
We talked about Obergefell v. Hodges, which guaranteed the right for his moms (me still in tears, Keri now using an educational placemat to illustrate the structure of the United States justice system) to legally marry last fall in a ceremony that opened with a reading from that ruling.
We talked about Korematsu v. United States, which upheld the internment of Japanese Americans during World War II, which included Keri’s grandmother, Betty Matsumoto. She was 20-years-old in 1942 when she had to leave her home in California to join her fellow Japanese American citizens at the Heart Mountain “Relocation Center” in Wyoming.
You win some. You lose some and break lives in half. But at least there has always been some semblance of a chance.
WHAT’S AT STAKE
With the passing of Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, the possible forcing through of another Trump pick to the Supreme Court before the November election is terrifying.
If McConnell is successful in his hypocritical campaign to rush-fill RGB’s seat, the Court will be irreparably stacked: 6 conservative justices to 3 liberal-leaning ones. Under that ratio, the interests of corporations and those already flush with money and power will guide the majority, while justices with a demonstrated commitment to the rights of American citizens will represent only one third of the Court.
This split is no longer about party lines. Our basic human rights are up for vote while our most vulnerable citizens teeter on a precocious and terrifying edge.
WHAT NOW?
So many of us are scared and exhausted. But we are also dogged and resourceful, looking earnestly for the helpers and leaders. One step in the right direction might be to stop looking up for someone to care and take charge. Look around instead.
First we grieve. As people. Not as voters or as liberals or conservatives, just as devastated citizens who’ve lost a light.
And then we take all of the love and rage and fear we have swirling around inside of us like a sea, and we act. Let’s turn that sea into a wave. A blue one.
TAKE ACTION
1. Check your voter registration
Go to nass.org/can-I-vote. Scroll down and click on the “Voter Registration Status” button. Select your state. Add your name and birthday and then your voter registration status will be instantly available.
If it turns out you are not registered, or your info needs updating, take care of it today.
Then vote as soon as you can. Here’s an early voting calendar from Vote.org, organized by state.
2. Prepare to protest
McConnell will do everything in his power to force a nomination through before November 3rd. Don’t let him do that without a fight. And then keep fighting. Up to election day and after it, no matter the result.
If the current administration steals a second term, we will need to fight to preserve any thread of remaining democracy and decency in America.
If Biden and Harris win the vote, we will need to fight to get the desperate megalomaniac currently in the White House to concede and then leave, while he calls on (tweets on?) his armed followers to incite a civil war.
Does that sound like hyperbole? Overreacting? Perhaps this worst-case-scenario thread from Brynn Tannehill might convince you. It terrified me.
Protest can look like a lot of different things. Here are just two options.
Call your representatives. Here’s a guide from 5calls.org that offers straightforward call scripts organized by issues of concern. Once you enter your zip code, the phone numbers for your state’s representatives are automatically displayed above the script.
If it’s possible for you, get ready to return to the streets. The Black Lives Matter Movement is lighting our way on this one. Here’s a guide from Amnesty International on how to demonstrate your First Amendment rights safely and legally.
3. Reach out
Your friends who are not white, heterosexual, cisgender, Christian, able-bodied, and residing comfortably in America’s ruling socioeconomic class are likely having a hard time right now.
That means you too, if any part of your identity means that you are being framed by our current administration as a “them” standing in the way of making America hate again.
Find your people. Leave cake on your friend’s doorstep. Zoom happy hour with your book club until you all are drunk-declaring that you’ll be best friends forever. Call your mom. Text your introverted friends. Sign up for Citizen University’s next Civic Saturday and make some new friends. Check to see if your elderly neighbors need groceries or human interaction.
HANG IN THERE
Take care of yourself by taking care of others, and gathering up whatever scraps of yourself are still in the fight and using those scraps to build a community. We’re going to need us.
Rest in Power, Notorious RBG. You legacy will be a revolution.
With solidarity and cautious but determined optimism—
K.
Kristin Leong is the misfit and unlikely optimist behind ROCK PAPER RADIO. She’s also a producer at KUOW Public Radio, a member of TED-Ed’s third cohort of 30 global Innovative Educators, and she was nominated for the 2020 Seattle Mayor’s Arts Award. Find her on Twitter @kristinleong and on Instagram @leongstagram.