RPR 104: Love and laundry
also, Jerry Springer wasn't who you thought he was and graffiti mom forever
SOMETHING TO LISTEN TO
I don’t like secrets, but I’m all in for complicated people with histories and hobbies that would bewilder their workmates. In the case of this 31-minute Act from This American Life’s archives, I've Got A Secret I've Been Hiding From You, that complicated person happens to be Jerry Springer. The infamous talk show host passed away two weeks ago.
Better known for bringing out the worst in the worst people on his show (actual episodes included 1998’s I Married a Horse, and 2014’s She Took My Man...And My Car!), Springer’s path to facilitating scandalous conversations was an unlikely one to say the least.
Spolier alert—Jerry Springer was an idealistic lawyer-turned-politician fighting for unions and accessible healthcare in his former life. And the kicker is…he was great at it. Inspiring. Big-dreaming. Successful. In the clips from his speeches in the episode, he sounds like a young JFK.
While his hopes for a future as a political changemaker were sidelined by a scandal of his own involving a sex worker, he returned to his civic duty roots even after all those seasons of fighting exes and Big Reveals on his controversial show. This is a truly great listen and it’s an excellent reminder that humans are three dimensional characters. RIP Jerry.
SOMETHING TO READ
It’s Mother’s Day this weekend (or Mothers’ Day, for my fellow two-mom households), so I’m feeling like I usually do this time of year: Rushed to plan something with my sister for our mom, or rushed to remind Teenager Leong to plan something for me and Keri, rushed in general, as usual. It feels like a lot of pressure to capture with this role means in one Sunday. It’s my life. It’s our life, me and Keri’s, every day, forever now.
And because all the parenting cliches are true—the days are long, but the years are so short; those babies and big teenagers really do feel like a chunk of your heart walking around outside of your body—I always want Mothers’ Day to be…something.
But then! I read essays like this from Lisa Hanson in Mutha Magazine, Graffiti Mom: MOMZ1, and I’m reminded that the requisite holiday plans don’t matter at all.
I wasn’t a teen parent like Hansen, but I was lost and immature when I first became a mom, and like Hansen, I grew up right alongside my boy too. This essay is a beautiful ride through the terror and joy of parenting while coming of age—which, I think is true for all parents, regardless of when kids come into our lives.
SOMETHING TO HOLD ON TO
Jean Bizimana’s photos of single mothers in Rwanda are stunning. There’s 17-year-old Afissa Usanase gracefully hanging laundry. There’s 22-year-old university student Ernestine Uwamahoro combing her hair after showering her baby with a little sparkle in her eye.
For her story, The life of single mothers: Photo essay, in Rwanda’s The New Times, Bizimana photographed and interviewed single mothers on what motherhood means to them. In Rwandan culture, Bizimana says that single moms are ostracized.
Bizimana opens her essay by sharing that she was raised in an orphanage and has never met her mother. In both her essay and her captions for the photos, there’s threads of curiosity, defiance, and hope. Here’s what she noted about all of the mothers she met:
“Speaking to all the women featured in this essay, they all shared one thing in common; the determination for their children to succeed against all odds.”
Enjoy!
THAT’S A WRAP ON ISSUE 104
Thanks for listening, reading, holding on, friends.
And happy Mother’s/Mothers’ Day to all of my mom readers! And if this Hallmark holiday is a complicated one for you, I see you. Just remember it’s socially acceptable to drink wine with breakfast this weekend. ❤️
See you next week,
K.